Thursday 3 January 2013

How do you creep up on a seal?



 The Neanderthal people of SONG HUNTER live in an inland valley, but at least one of my Neanderthals must have come from far away because he bears the name of a sea-creature.

 He’s called Seal.

 I relied a great deal on the knowledge of the Inuit people of the far north when I was writing SONG HUNTER. The Inuit have had to overcome similar challenges to my Neanderthals: they've both lived in a cold climate with, until recently, only occasional access to sources of wood.

 This is how you creep up on a seal.

 The first thing you have to do is wait for your seal to go to sleep. The problem then is that seals only sleep for about a minute at a time: and obviously you can't run far in a minute.

Your big advantage is that although seals are brilliant at spotting any sort of movement, they're not much good at all at noticing anything completely still.

So what you have to do is play What’s the time, Mr Seal?

 Step forward...and then freeze before it opens its eyes.

 Step...and...freeze.

 (You’ll know when you have to stop moving because just before it opens its eyes a muscle will twitch in its neck.)

 Step...and...freeze.

 Well done.

 Now. Fancy some raw seal liver?

 

2 comments:

  1. Gosh that seems like SUCH doomed work. It's a miracle that anyone got any liver at all. I'll pass on that, ta!

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  2. It would at least be quicker than making roast turkey with all the trimmings.

    And serving raw seal liver would be a brilliant way of escaping from the dinner party circuit, don't you think?

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